so I was once told by a P.H.D in Eastern Religion and Philosophy, that I should NOT ASK ‘WHY’ QUESTIONS, because they can never be fully answered, and only lead to more ‘WHY’ QUESTIONS. So… so straight off the bat, I am going to dismiss that advice. I try to gain information, sometimes haphazardly or with no real objective in mind. Tonight, I found lectures on the medical issues regarding transgender people. It helped me to understand why, with the hormones I took, that I hit a ceiling in the change. What I was doing was tremendously dangerous, and this Doctor really was knowledgeable and cutting edge. I am lucky to have not developed a tumor, or had some sort of stroke from what I did to myself, with the best information in medical books to do it on my own, DIY. I had no bloodwork to base my dosages, even if I did, what real doctors do with that info, is still up to debate within practice. What struck me about the lecture, was that when Transgender People are Given MRI’s of their brains, without other doctors knowing what Gender of the said person’s MRI, near 100 Percent of those brains were classified AS THE GENDER THAT THE PERSON’S IDENTIFIED AS, NOT THE ONE THEY HAD AT BIRTH. So a Male transgender to Female, BRAIN SCAN WAS READ AS FEMALE, NOT MALE. WHY is THAT? There are many factors that can lead to a brain developing that way. One that interested me, was the amount of Estrogen in the Mother Giving Birth to a Child while in the Womb. Therefore, a woman with huge amounts of Estrogen in her system giving birth to a Boy, who correspondingly will have HUGE amounts of Estrogen in his system, leading towards some sort of Gender Identity Ideas and Actions later on in His/her Life. An example shown of this development, was from the 1930’s thru the late 1960’s, woman who had miscarriage’s, were given a drug, brand named, called DESPLEX, which contained 600 times the regular amount of Estrogen to make certain, the woman could give birth. The children of the Woman given that drug, had ELEVATED amounts of Estrogen, leading to Transgender minds, Transgender issues later on in life. So…. I took part for cash, in a Psych Study at Indiana University. I was given a Brain Scan, MRI, while being bombarded with images and sounds while being asked questions regarding what I was experiencing. A lot of my answers, I decided, were simply aesthetic responses. At the end of the study, I was given a CD ROM of my brain scan, and the Psychologist who ran the study, said, “People will be Jealous of Your Brain.” I then signed a form that I could not use my CD ROM in any medical diagnoses in the future, a legal condition of the experiment. So…. NOW, I just wanna know, or figure out, HOW I can have another scan of my brain done, give it to another doctor, without them knowing my Gender, and for that OUTSIDE DOCTOR OR SHRINK, to be asked is THAT BRAIN MALE OR FEMALE? My curiosity is peaked! Is my brain more male or female? How much ESTROGEN was coursing thru the body of my mom when I was in the womb, and how much, if so, could have been passed on to me? These are curiosities, and makes me ask the abominable QUESTION, WHY?
Categories: Manic Beatnik Riffing